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Posts by zarelha

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Forum Topic Date Replies
Calorie Count Daily Burn of Calories (BMR) Jun 24 2013
15:34 (UTC)

According to the formula, my "coma" BMR is 768 calories a day.  Seems pretty low, even for no activity. 

However, my recommended "burn amount" (and minimum calories for everyone - too bad for us short, healthy-weight people) is 1200. So if I were in a coma, and was being fed that intravenously every day, I would gain almost a pound a week!  :)

Weight Loss Help me addicted to junk food May 30 2013
04:13 (UTC)

It's tough to break the sugar and fat cravings. But it's possible! And eventually they do get under control. For me, the best way was to go cold turkey for two weeks.  I know!!!  It takes some willpower, but I kept telling myself that it was only for a little while so I did make it through.

I cut out processed sweets and sugars, as well as soda (even diet).  But I still ate fruit.  After a week, my body had stopped the "if I don't have a piece of cake RIGHT NOW I'm going to die!!!!" screams and was just whimpering a little. After two weeks, I felt more in control :).  I did find alternatives - this sounds crazy, but brussel sprouts remind me of chocolate, so I ate those a lot. Carrots, apples, strawberries and bananas helped too. 

After the weeks, I allowed myself one sweet thing a day. Only one, so I had to choose carefully.  I didn't feel deprived, and it did make me be more mindful of what I ate.  Today, I still have one sweet treat a day, usually either for dessert or at night (most days it's something small like a piece of dark chocolate), and it keeps me satisfied.  I notice that when I break this rule and start eating more sweets, I tend to gain weight and my cravings run rampant, and I have to "detox" again ...

On the other side, start exercising. It will do wonders for you no matter what your weight, and if you make it a habit early in life it will serve you well for your entire life.

The Lounge Irony... no? Jun 14 2010
00:38 (UTC)

No irony at all. Eating a balanced diet is what it's all about. Allowing kids to be kids and have pizza parties is part of a balanced life, and can very well be a part of a balanced diet. Good for her for letting her little girl get what she wanted for her B-day, especially as none of them is overweight - obviously, they're doing a good job of teaching moderation and active lifestyles.

Fitness itchy May 06 2010
03:25 (UTC)

When I first start exercising after a period of no exercise, I get the same thing, especially in my thighs and calves. It's almost unbearable and it's all I can do not to scratch myself bloody! But with time and continued exercise, it goes away for me.

"A person, starting to run after a prolonged period of inactivity can experience intense itch shortly after the start. In a fit runner, the small arteries in the muscles usually open rapidly in response to high demand to blood, but in an unfit runner arteries may not open properly, resulting in irritation of adjacent nerves and itch. The problem should resolve with training." 

For some people, it's an allergy to sweat or the clothes you're wearing. If that's the case, try showering immediately after exercise, changing your soap and/or moisturizer, and the clothes you wear.

If it doesn't go away as your capillaries get used to the blood flow, or after trying some of the changes above, you could also have Cholinergic urticaria (hives): red, swollen bumps or patches appearing on the skin as an allergic reactionin to physical stimuli.

Sometimes it helps to take an antihistamine prior to exercise.

Weight Loss Why would someone GAIN weight if they're eating less than 1000cals? May 06 2010
01:52 (UTC)

Have you looked at medical reasons? Here are articles referencing hormone imbalances, PCOS, water weight, thyroid issues, tumors and other causes of potential unexplained weight gain.  You may want to have a physical and let your doctor know about this symptom. 

Weight Gain Article

Weight Gain Article 2

Motivation Is anyone else a slow loser? Apr 16 2010
03:54 (UTC)

I don't have a lot to lose, but last time it took me a few months to lose 10 lbs. Now I have 13 to lose (again) and it's a couple of years later, and I'm hoping maybe that will change! 

I seem to only lose weight once a month, right after TTOM.  Why? I don't know. I do know that, If I don't count all month, I won't lose anything at all; but if I do count the entire month, then I will see a 1-2 lb loss at that time, and very seldom at any other time. I figure, though, slow is better than not at all! 

I have also found, as has been mentioned, that if I go under 1,400 calories I rarely lose at all, except maybe the first week when my body is not yet used to it. And, for me, calorie cycling also seems to make it go a little faster. I think each person needs to try different things and see what works best.

And THIS is why I don't let my weight go more than 10 lbs over goal!

Weight Loss Back again Apr 11 2010
14:59 (UTC)

That's why I love CC!  It's a place to come back to in order to gain back control.

I, too, am back after a year or more away.  My weight slowly crept up 18 pounds. The first 5 I didn't mind so much; both my hubby and I liked the way I looked with those back on.  The last 13 bother me because all my clothes are tight and it is just taking too long to get into those special-order jeans again! :)  And boy, are they uncomfortable when they're tight.

I do weigh myself frequently anyway, so it was no surprise; I just had to come to the point where it made me mad enough to do something about it.  So in ... 3 days, I'm down 4.6 lbs. I know it's mostly water weight, but at least now I feel like I'm taking control. I'm logging, and I will be starting back to exercising (I did the Run Around the World here on CC 2 years ago ... so now I feel a little like a lump).

So good for you for coming back! You're not the only one. And if we did it once, we can do it again. I think the key is to catch it early and not let it progress!

Fitness My 10yr olds concerned with thigh jiggle! May 19 2009
06:56 (UTC)

I agree with jcl76. The best thing we can do for our children is to tell them they are perfect just the way they are - at least at this age, at least physically. 

I felt fat all my life. I wasn't, but I was bigger than my older sister (who has never weighed over 110 lbs in her entire life, even now in her 40s when she has 2 kids). My parents always referred to me as "the chubby one" and my siblings quickly found my Achilles heel. Although I went through a pudgy period at 10-13, I was nowhere near fat. By the time I was 13, though, my relationship with food had changed forever. I could recite the calories on every food ever made - I read calorie guides at night and was obsessed with food and diets. Took about 16 years to get over that.

If someone had told me I was FINE and BEAUTIFUL (and I was; looking back at pictures of myself), I may not have had some of the issues I eventually faced.

Do you know when I was able to get over my issues? When someone (a man) told me he loved my body EXACTLY as it was (and it was by no means perfect). Before that, I had never felt beautiful. Sad!!!  And I actually felt that he meant it, and he showed me every day.  I stopped obsessing almost immediately.  I wish I could have felt at 10 like I did from that day on at 26. It was a "lightbulb" moment for me, and although I didn't end up with the guy, I am grateful beyond all belief for what he did for me.

At 10, I believe only our parents can give us that same shot of self esteem.

Good luck with your daughter. I know parenting is super-tough these days, and it's difficult to know what the "right" thing to do is. Just keep reminding her how much you love her, not because of what she looks like, but because of who she IS. And let her know she's beautiful, right now, this minute, just as she is.

The Lounge did anyone else thing the biggest loser lost too much weight? May 18 2009
00:44 (UTC)

People have done worse for $250,000. I would, if I could, even if I didn't plan to STAY at that weight - and she probably won't.  I hope she does find a good weight, though, that she can maintain. It was a lot of work to get there!

Weight Loss Um.. how much do boobs weigh?! May 17 2009
17:41 (UTC)

Sorry, I don't belong here with my barely-Bs, but this was too funny. The thought of trying to weigh one of them made me laugh - but I can see how a larger-sized woman would definitely be able to, easily, on a kitchen or baby scale!  And, they could weigh as much as a newborn! Surprised

I wish mine were large enough to weigh; I'd do it now just for fun.

The Lounge Missing Son, Prayers Please**-- BODY FOUND--** May 17 2009
17:25 (UTC)


I've been away for quite a few months, but always came back to check on this thread, always hoping for positive news. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I hope you will find comfort in your loved ones and the knowledge that we all have you in our thoughts.

The Lounge Kids these days? May 15 2009
17:10 (UTC)

Lorik: It's "you're," not "your."  It's been bothering me this whole post.

Coreyander: The problem starts even earlier. I just started teaching for a test prep company, mainly for pre-college tests. I don't have children, and haven't been around them for a while, so this was a huge eye-opening experience on the adolescent attitude. The company has a very strict policy (which both students and parents have to read and sign) as to what is required of the student if they want to exercise their "guarantee," which allows them to either take the class again or get their money back.  Let me tell you, the work required for the guarantee is minimal, compared to what is available to the students.  And yet ... it's a daily event that parents and students complain that they should be able to apply their guarantee - even though the student completely failed to comply with even the minimal requirements. Kids show up late or miss class altogether; never log in to their online syllabus; don't do their homework; don't take the quizzes or miss entire exams.  Yet they still wonder why their scores are not improving, and feel entitled to complain when they are turned down for the guarantee!

It is these kids who will have problems in college. People like lorik, who feel that "being a little late" or "doing enough to just get by" is "not a big deal," will have a huge shock in the real world when their bosses, colleagues and clients don't feel the same way.  Especially in today's economy, "the real world" is looking for stand-out individuals, not just coasters.  And that attitude is often ingrained, and not just situational.

But you know what, to use two cliches, water finds its own level, and cream floats to the top.  Life has a way of teaching lessons that no professor (or TA) ever could.

PS - The SATs do have an essay. And it is shocking to see the level of writing. However, I have been pleased to see how a little instruction can improve that in a short amount of time.

The Lounge College students should be required to maintain a 3.5 GPA. Dec 03 2008
17:41 (UTC)

Here's my take:

Education is important. It's also a privilege. But it should not be the privilege of only one type of person.

If someone wants to pursue education, they should be able to do so. If they are not getting subsidized and are paying for it themselves, they should be able to continue to do so for as long as they want to continue trying.

Some people need to take classes more than once to pass them. That's OK. College should not be an elitist institution for "smart" people only. I think there's a lot to be said for guts, too. There are many people who have the desire and will continue to work hard as long as they are given the chance, to meet the graduation requirements. If it takes them 10 years instead of 4 because they have to take some classes over to meet those requirements, who are we to say - "No, you've taken too long, you have to stop trying now. We have decided you have failed!"  Only the individual should be able to decide when to stop educating themselves.

I don't think that everyone should be able to graduate without meeting graduation standards; but I do think everyone should be able to keep trying until they meet them, and not be kicked out due to some arbitrary number.

The Lounge When the wife(husband) is not home Oct 19 2008
04:01 (UTC)

Yay!  I'm glad I'm not the only "let-it-all-go-until-you-hear-the-car-door-sl am"-er!  I always feel like I SHOULD do more, but honestly, it's so rare that I have time alone in the house (my DH is a homebody) that I cherish every second.  He's also a neat-freak, so usually I'm on much better behavior when he's around.

When he's gone, and it's a weekend, I don't make the bed, I may not shower every night (GASP!), I may wear the same clothes more than twice, I read a lot or watch stupid reality shows, I eat only things that either don't need cooking or can be microwaved within 5 minutes - and I may even eat cereal out of the box in bed for dinner!  I don't always put the dishes in the dishwasher, and leave my shoes in the middle of the living room floor (one of DH's pet peeves).

I always make him call at least 2 hours before he comes home so I can do a speed-clean-and-tidy.  He knows it, too, and he knows it's for his own good!  It usually takes us a couple of days to get back to normal (me to remember to put the dishes away; he to remind me to move my shoes or make the bed!) :)

The Lounge when 2 people grow apart? Oct 08 2008
23:16 (UTC)

Sounds like what she did is grow up.  Nothing wrong with that.  But it can cause those around her to no longer see her the same way.  Human brains are not fully "formed" until the mid-twenties.  Especially when there is such a limited variety of experiences prior to that time.

Let's face it - how many of us are still best friends with the same best friend from High School?  Not many.  Why?  Because our lives changed and moved in totally different directions.  Can it work?  Sure, if both people remain stagnant (exactly the same), or move forward together in similar patterns.  But that is asking a lot of a relationship if one person is growing at a different rate or in a different direction.

Some things are negotiable (what you eat, wear, where you live).  Others are not (what you believe and feel).  But just the way that someone can stop believing in God one day, or wanting children, they could change again (as they get closer to 30 or 40).  I'm sure her husband has changed too.  We all do.  So I think the question (for your friend and her husband) would be: are they willing to accept each other as they are NOW, and willing to work out compromises on important issues?  If he REALLY wants children, and she doesn't, he will have to make a choice.  Either he stays and waits it out to see if she will change her mind (without pressure), or he will move on to find someone who can give him what he wants.  She will need to accept that decision.  Ditto if he REALLY wants someone to share his religious beliefs.

I got married at 20.  By the time I was 23, I realized my husband was never going to do the things I had hoped.  He was not going to pursue higher education; he was not interested in moving up in his job; he wanted to live in the same small house we'd bought as a "starter" for the next 50 years; his religion became more and more important to him.  He wanted me to stay home after I got my degree and just have children.  That was NOT what I wanted, so we parted amicably.  It hurt like hell for a while, but it's probably the best choice I ever made - I just can't imagine what my life would have been like had I stayed and tried to be who he wanted me to be (and who I WAS, when I first married him - I thought "love" woud conquer all and that I could bury my needs just to be with him).  I hear he's still living in the same house, 20+ years later, so more power to him.  I got a Masters degree, moved a gazillion times, have no religion, and had no kids.  More power to me.  We would have driven each other mad, or one of us would have been extremely unhappy for all this time.

Motivation Need advice from girls or guys with girlfriends who maybe went through this.. Oct 07 2008
23:23 (UTC)

I'm sorry that your girlfriend is being so unhelpful.  It sounds like she's a bit immature and controlling.  She's trying to get you to change for her, but won't do a lick to change for you.  And I'm sorry, you're allowing (even encouraging) it, so in a way, it's up to you to stop it.

I would give her the suggestions above (rent DVDs at home, find a more private gym, buy healthy food that she likes, etc.)  But then I would leave it alone.  You two are not attached at the hip, and there is no reason you can't each have your own lives. 

You know how kids act up all the time just for your attention?  It seems that she's received A LOT of yours lately!  Trying to change your schedule (numerous times); leaving the gym when she says; trying to find some way to "motivate" her.  About the food:  not only is she not paying for it,  but you're cooking FOR HER and she's still not happy?  Guess what?  At my house, no matter who cooks, there is one meal cooked.  Whoever doesn't like it, gets to make their own.  If she uses this as a "threat" - "well, I don't like what you cooked, so I'm going to get a Bic Mac instead" - let her.  She is in control of what goes into her mouth; if she chooses to sabotage herself in order to control you, that's her issue, not yours.  Keep cooking healthy for yourself; she's a grown-up, she won't starve to death.  Also, your sleep is important, and it sounds like she doesn't care.

But not only are you cooking her meals, you're trying to solve her problems - and I'm sorry to tell you that you can't.  Only she can.  And it doesn't sound like she wants to.  It seems what she really wants to do is go back to the "good old days" and have you go back with her.  This quote says it all: 

"my GF said she wanted to lose weight with me, but she didn't want to excersize or change what she ate"  What????  Have you ever heard the definition of insanity? Continuing to do what you're doing and expecting different results.

If you don't want to go back to the good old days with her, you can continue to ask her to go with you to the gym and offer her your healthy foods, but keep moving forward and don't try so hard to drag her along.  Don't nag, beg, cajole, or try to "fix" things for her.  You will get resentful, and she will get ever-needier, and that's not a healthy place for a relationship to be. 

If and when she gets to the place where she asks (and willingly accepts!!) your advice/help, that's when you can SHARE your healthy lifestyle with her - on your terms.

The Lounge Why girls tend to prefer "not nice guys" Oct 05 2008
03:28 (UTC)

I was brought up by parents who love and respect each other (over 50 years now!) and never said anything abusive to each other, nor did they allow us kids to say bad things about each other.  We grew up with almost "too much" self-esteem, to the point of arrogance at times.  I could get quite uppity with friends who "let people treat them THAT way!"  I couldn't understand it, and I tended to lose respect for them rather quickly.

In my mid-twenties, after an early marriage and divorce from a truly nice (but boring) guy who just wanted different things out of life, I fell head over heels in lust/love with a totally "bad boy".  No physical abuse, but he showed just about every sign of emotional abuse, although I just thought he was exciting and fun. I would plan my entire LIFE around him; I'd wait by the phone for HOURS waiting for him to call instead of going out with my friends; I'd stand my friends up or change plans in a second if he wanted something; I did many things in I would never have thought to do on my own and were not always ethical, moral, or even completely legal (no drugs or weapons involved).  And I cried more in those months than I ever had in my entire life.  I can't explain it, but he had complete and total hold of me. 

And then, I snapped out of it.  One day, I realized this relationship was just so TIRING compared to my previous relationships.  I was always on edge; always nervous; always crying; always waiting!  The straw that broke the camel's back was a simple thing - one more day that he had set a date, and I'd canceled all my plans, and an hour later, no call, no-show.  By the time he showed up, an hour after that, I locked him out of my apartment and never spoke to him again (he left 37 messages on my answering machine that night, each one more disturbing).

Now, I still don't understand why people stay in certain types of relationships - but I have a smidge more empathy and I want to grab those people and force them to go cold-turkey like I did.  It was hard and emotionally wrenching at the time, but I knew there was no way to slowly move away.

I'm reformed! :)  I still like the IDEA of a bad boy; but not the reality; so I content myself with snuggling with my good-guy hubby while watching bad-boy movies!

The Lounge "Quotes" Say More About You Than You Think! Oct 05 2008
02:07 (UTC)

I'm just wondering how they feel now, the analysts and brokers who are being punished for the profilgacy, stupidity, greed, and wishful thinking of their masters.  How they feel as they dust off their resumes in a world flooded with needy drifters just lke them?

-- Fortune Magazine Oct 13 2008, "The Big Payback" by Stanley Bing

Weight Loss Weight-Loss Pills? Sep 26 2008
22:40 (UTC)
I would suggest you stay away.  All any pills can do is fool your body, not train it to eat right in the long term. 

And the side effects (heart palpitations, jitteriness, headaches, the side effects of Ali, etc.) would tend to tell me most people's bodies are not so happy in taking them in, either.  They didn't know some of those "weight-loss" pills caused heart problems until months or years after many people had suffered - who's to say the pill you take today won't be the one everyone's suing over tomorrow?

One of my sisters-in-law has a heart problem now that is being attributed to the pills she took when she was younger.  Not something to be played with, in my opinion.
The Lounge Freaky - Doll Lovers Sep 08 2008
04:18 (UTC)
"relationships with humans are just temporary ... I'm different from most people ... I can bond with inanimate objects"  Eep.  They all have names.