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Posts by tvand2

User's Posts | User's Topics

Forum Topic Date Replies
The Lounge Question for people who are in relationships May 13 2012
12:07 (UTC)

You are an emotionally abused woman.  Him calling you names etc is his bad behaviour....DO NOT apologize.  I left my husband of 9yrs with with whom I have two daughters. ( they were 5 and 8) when we left.  I packed what I could fit in my car and went to my parent's house.  I am asking you to really consider if you are happy.  I am guessing he cycles..( where he is nice sometimes, which is called the Honeymoon phase, and then he gets mean again.)  This type of behaviour really messes with your mind....and do you want your child seeing you go through this or perhaps go through this themselves.  It would be wonderful IF he willl go to counselling....but would it help? I believe my ex to be mentally sick, as HE comes first, if I would try to explain he was hurting me, he would become very defensive and fire back...making me feel like I was crazy, overtime I thought I was going crazy and he was becoming more possessive.  THIS IS are worthy of more, as was I.  Please look up the cycle of abuse.   You have not only you to think about now, but your baby.  I KNOW it is difficult, my ex HAS made my life as well as my girl's a living hell for the past four years, and all because he had no control!! (all about him)  BUT, I have shown my girl's that being treated like that is not acceptable and I want better for them and myself.  I wish you the best....think not with your heart at this time, go with your gut.  Seek family and friend are important. 

The Lounge daddy divorce probs May 09 2012
22:07 (UTC)

I would first try to approach the subject with your Mom AND Dad to let them both know how you are feeling.  I would make your wants very clear!!!  I know it is difficult but being honest always works best.  If your Mom is unwilling to accept this, then I would talk to your Dad and inform him that you want custody changed and ask him to help you.  You are old enough to make your own decisions and hopefully he can help you obtain a lawyer to voice this in court. 

Your happiness is what is important, but it also concerns me that your Dad is gone a great deal, as you still require a parent!!!

Best of luck to you.

The Lounge Geez, does The Lounge need a happy pill? Apr 26 2012
11:38 (UTC)

OK............happy thoughts!!!!  Summer will soon be here, hello beach, tan, outdoors!!!!!

hope it is contagious

Have a splendid day everyone, I am going to try....not so good yesterday, but today is gonna bring me goodness  ( "

The Lounge Job decisions! Apr 25 2012
13:27 (UTC)

I have learned that guilt is a wasted emotion.  Also, you don't owe anyone anything.   The only person you are accountable to is YOU, and you deserve happiness.  It sounds like you know what you want, go with your intuition, it will always lead you to where you are supposed to be in this life.   Change is difficult, but fear of the unknown will sometimes cement us in an unhappy job, relationship etc.....GO FOR of worthy of happiness and fulfillment.

Let me know how you make out.....everything will work out as it should.

The Lounge Long distance relationships Apr 25 2012
12:20 (UTC)


Hi, thanks for your response.  Yes we go out for dinner, get together with friend's (when he comes to my house)  THe biggest problem is his daughter who wants nothing to do with his dating and therefore I am not welcomed there when she chooses to go there.  He keeps me separated from her (after a year and a half) I respect his concern for his daughter BUT am feeling if he is going to move here, how on earth would it work out??? I know it takes work for a relationship, but I don't think there should be so much questioning after a year and a half together...if we were going to be, we would be. 

As much as it hurts, You are correct, there are greener pastures.


Thanks for your response

Health & Support I need help:( Apr 24 2012
22:02 (UTC)

You are harming your body, you need to increase your calories.  Please let a parent know or go see your Dr.  It sounds like you need help asap.  I am 39 now, reading your post brought back memories.  I am telling you, I was 5'2 and 112pds at your age, I am now 190pds.   My years of starving myself and yo yo dieting has taken a toll on my health.  Please don't look at the scale, just try to be a healthy active deserve it.

The Lounge Long distance relationships Apr 24 2012
21:48 (UTC)

Yes, I have voiced my concerns....he doesn't seem to have time to talk on the phone, and doesn't appear to like more than a text to tell me good night and good morning and to have a good day.  IT was more at the beginning, but has lessened over time.  You are absolutely correct, and it really made sense to me when you said if he was worth my heart I would do anything for this relationship.  I am obviously not fulfilled and feel a great deal is lacking.  It is difficult, because when we are together we have a wonderful time....although I do believe another person is out there who could fulfill my needs.

Thanks so much for your response, I appreciate it.  Good for you and your bf, keep up the effort, it will be worth it.  I am happy for you.

Weight Loss Does anyone want to be my diet partner? Apr 24 2012
15:04 (UTC)

Hi, I could use some partners as well!!!  Would like to lose 50pds....I am 38 (almost 39) and want to feel good.  Message me, would love some partners.

The Lounge How much do you spend on clothes? Apr 24 2012
14:57 (UTC)

Don't think there is any set have to do what works for you and your budget.  End of season is always the best prices.  You can find nice clothes at used clothing stores....always look on sale racks first.  Also, borrow from friend's if you can.

The Lounge I don't know where else to turn Apr 24 2012
14:50 (UTC)

Take a step back....this is NOT your stuff, sounds like this is your brother's to work out.  Of course you care for the baby, you are a decent human being.  BUT, wrap their crap and issues up and place it back in their lap.  You are allowing someone elses issues to sink into your being.  Look at your life and what makes you feel what works for you, not everyone else.  Next time you feel like releasing some anger, try a pillow, punching it or just scream....much cheaper than replacing car parts.  Alcohol NEVER helps, works as a depressant. 

The Lounge Long distance relationships Apr 24 2012
14:38 (UTC)

Thanks....I tried to be patient, it would be at least another year of this!!!  I want more physical contact.  Thanks, I don't feel like I was being so needy!!! not just me.

Games & Challenges April Challenge Apr 24 2012
11:15 (UTC)

Hoping you do a May challenge!!!!  Just GETTING SERIOUS with this....can't wait to begin.  I need to be accountable.

New Members Doing IT!!! Dec 29 2011
14:58 (UTC)
I know that feeling quite well. We can do this. I have 50 to lose, you?