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The Lounge
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Ok, so we all know people who are more talkative than others.  I've been voted most talkative many times.  I am sometimes self conscious about this. Any viewpoints? Please say what you really feel rather than just boosting my confidence.

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I'm introverted and I find people who are really talkative to be draining.

I am also an introvert.  There are many people I love who are talkative, but I do not love their talkativeness, if that makes sense.  Although I guess it depends on the situation.  If I'm at work, I don't want to hear every detail of what you did over the weekend or see the 100 pictures of your sons wedding, etc.  But if I'm hanging out with someone, it doesn't bother me as much.

I usually like talkative people (sometimes not for really prolonged periods of time). It is nice to just sit back and listen to someone, especially if they enjoy talking. I do get annoyed if they almost never stop talking or they don't like to listen to anyone else.

Depends on if what you are saying is interesting, and whether or not you monopolize the conversation. 

Agree with Wasalisa.  Talkative people can be great fun, but not when you get the impression that they are always just waiting for you to finish speaking so that they get their turn to talk again.

Don't be afraid to talk a lot - just make sure you also really listen.  Engage with what the other speaker is saying too.

I am on the shy side. I appreciate it when others talk because then it's not up to me to break the ice. I listen, then when there's a chance for me to join in, then I do when appropriate. It also helps a little to get to know people before I can intelligently communicate with them.

I would hope that if you are annoying anybody, then they'd be nice enough to tell you in a kind way. So, the answer to your question, I don't feel annoyed by talkative people....

Original Post by wasalisa:

Depends on if what you are saying is interesting, and whether or not you monopolize the conversation. 

Yeah, this is pretty much my view.

depends on if they're drunk or not.


Talkative people who don't know how to shut up and SHARE a conversation are annoying.

I'm talkative. But I also know how to shut up when I need to. Thus, I'm less annoying.

Original Post by kathygator:

depends on if they're drunk or not.

SO true, love that! ... 

It annoys me when I know that someone is talking just because they like to hear themselves 'talk'... 


There are always those couple of people who are really opinionated and I just nod. But they don't get the point and keep on talking... now THAT is draining.


But otherwise, I love talking to both talkative and not-so-talkative people. Just use your commonsense and if that person doesn't seem to be listening, s/he is either preoccupied with something or would rather do something else. You just have to get those subtle hints when people aren't really up for talking. But other wise, talk away! Don't be self-conscious!!!! A lot of people would love to have such attitude :D

Being talkative is good! As long as others have the opportunity to talk too. :P A lot of my friends are very talkative and it's usually fun, though today my cousin (who I absolutely adore) started talking about her friends and for some reason it went on forever without giving me the opportunity to share some of my stories, which was a little bit frustrating and edged on boring. :P

Also, if you put two very talkative people with lots in common, alcohol, and a 3rd, slightly less extroverted person on the side, it can be very frustrating for that 3rd person. Once I spent a whole 30 minutes trying to tell my 2 other friends that I was going to bed and ended up having to write it on a napkin and place it in between them so that they'd pay attention. Pretty humiliating really.

i think its better to be talkative than quiet. I hate when i try to talk to people and they just grunt at you. I'd rather have someone responsive even if they are a little enthusiastic! alot of times talkative people are charismatic. it is a great skill to be able to talk to people! my grandma is the most talkative person i know and everyone loves her! she's like the life of the party and she's in her 60s haha. we tease her about never shutting up, but we all think she's hilarious. talkative does not equal annoying. you could be annoying and talkative or just plain talkative or just plain annoying. at least you weren't voted most annoying...

As a non-talkative person who spends a lot of time really depends on what kind of takative you are. Some people are gifted speakers who know how to start conversations or keep them going, make everyone feel important and included, listen to social cues from others, etc. and then there are those who are just plain talkative. They talk talk talk, don't care if what they say is interesting to their listener, don't really look for a response past "mm hmm", compete for talking time and as someone else mentioned, you get the sense they are just waiting for you to finish what you are saying so they can start talking again....and just talk to fill any silences no matter how short. 

If you've been voted MOST talkative, well yeah I'd give some serious thought about whether you listen as well. And believe that sometimes it's ok, even preferable, for there to be a bit of silence. Just some things to consider.  

I heard a great bit of advice, perhaps it'll be of use to people here:

Keep your side of the conversation to peices of 10 seconds or less.

It's not a hard and fast rule, of course. Don't stand there with a pocketwatch and time yourself... but I've found that 10 seconds is generally enough to get your idea across and give other enough to give other people a chance to respond, or to give confirmation of understanding to what you're saying. You can literally chunk up a soapbox speech about the mating habits of the indiginous marsupials of southern sri lanka into 10 second nibbles and keep people engaged if you keep them interactive.

It also helps you develop the ability to render your ideas into a condensed form, which is often interpreted as certainty or decisiveness... an attractive quality in the workplace and when you're hanging with your buddies.

If you're verbose, give it a try. Cool

I would say for the best part they are and I spend most of my days pretending to listen, giving a nod, the occasional grunt.

I am for the best part probably over quiet, i have occassional days when i chat away.

I just can't be bothered with pointless chit chat...engage me in something in which i can learn something and has purpose behind it and you have my undivided attention. It's just a shame that I don't know very many people who can do that.

Original Post by andie-1:

I just can't be bothered with pointless chit chat...engage me in something in which i can learn something and has purpose behind it and you have my undivided attention. It's just a shame that I don't know very many people who can do that.

 Amen!  I hate it when people talk "at" you instead sharing  conversation.

My eyes glaze over and I get really twitchy and suddenly have a million things to do.

Yeah they are, unless they're making an effort to engage you in the conversation.

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