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I had serious problem. and i think i will end my life soon

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Well, i am used to a strict diet and once facing with something like Anorexia.  But lately . i had been binge eating. I eat non stop whole day ! i gain so much for just about 2 weeks and yet i hasnt stop ! I ate rice . sushi . chocolate cake . ice -cream. and everything fattening. every fattening food and snack that u can name. and i ate it,, I eat till i feel bloated . and even though i wan to vomit .. i stil continue eating. I hate myself so much! I rather to have anorexia than binge.!

 I start binge becuz i feel unhappy. I am waiting for my result. so i went to look for a part time job. and work as a waitress in a japanese restaurant. the ppl is not really friendly. and due to the unhappiness. i started to binge.!

I really hate myself very much. I feel so disgust with myself. and today .i done something bad. I hurt myself by using the cutter and cut my wrist.  I do it infront of my sister because . i was complaining bout my weight and how much i become fatter becuz of this 3 weeks of binge eating. I am not thin anymore and i hate it. I wan to be thin and everything has changed .becuz i gain so much! I was crying and all of the sudden i grab my cutter and cut myself.!Can anyone help.. i really wan to lose weight. back to the way before.

 I am very unhappy.. Anyone suffering from Binge eating disorder and depression? I think i am not cure yet. i Still cant control my emotion. i hate myself very much. can anyone help me plssss.. if u do have msn.. please leave. and maybe u can help me ..

give me advice. pls. i am afraid that one day i may kill myself.. and believe. me.. i have a strong urge to do tat.. aaaand i think i wont be able to control myselff

Edited Nov 26 2008 15:13 by nycgirl
Reason: Locked due to reference to suicide. Please call the suicide hotlines or get help immediately if you are still having these thoughts. See hotline info here:
24 Replies (last)

Its hard to stop a habit thats for sure and I have definitely felt the way you have. Sometimes I feel like "whats the point for anything?" I've been realizing i need a distraction or a hobby that will make me feel like i have a purpose again. Getting a job might be good for you because it gives you something to do and think about. I've been struggling with various symptoms of EDs. One thing i've been doing lately is chewing and spitting which I know is not a good thing but if your wanting to not purge but still binge this might be an interim tactic to stopping the binge because then your not intaking the calories and stuff of what your eating. I'm not saying its a good plan but it might help you stop the binging. 

Please don't hate yourself. you are worth it no matter how you feel. We just have to rediscover the could be as simple as a flower-focus on its beauty and remember the beauty in the world : ) be strong 

Chewing and spitting does not eliminate the calories and leaves you without most of the nutrition. Digestion starts in the mouth with the saliva breaking down simple sugars and continues after you swallow in the various parts of the intestine. Chewing and spitting is considered to be disordered eating and frequently leads to more serious conditions, please do not start, get some help.

I hope that you'll take the time to read the following resources:

Matthew Tiemeyer's Eating Disorders Guide.

These some of the topics that are pertinent.

Additionally, several of our members and moderators put the following thread together:

Eating Disorders resources & information thread

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usually we over eat because our lives are so uncontrollable that we need someting to hang on to, something we know we can control. Most of the time that's me i had this problem before, you feel sad you whip out the doritos then all of a sudden you're craving a pop tart. I used to get uncontrollable urges to eat really unhealthy snacks, i used to have almost two lunches. so here's what you do...don't stop all at once. over eating is like running ( i know weird comparison) you have to take it in steps... on the first craving eat but don't over do it. Only go for the chips, if you start to crave something else after that DON'T eat it. Try drinking some water, after i cut soda from my diet i found i had a lot less of a want for junk food. and if you're ever depressed don't turn to food to help you (it clearly only hurts) turn to something more soohting like music, writing, even talking with a friend. I started running, it helps relax your mind, don't like running? try whatever you feel would block the world out for a while..ha i know this is long but it'a a big topic with me too hope it helps!!!

: 3

i've been in your shoes before.

i had suffered from an eating disorder (anorexia) for around 8 months, and when i finally stopped i began to binge, put on 20 lbs in weeks and took an entire bottle of ibuprophen as a suicide attempt.

let me tell you, it's not a smart thing to do. the most embarassing moment i've ever experienced was that day, when i had to tell a social worker i tried to end my life because i felt too fat to live.

is your weight really worth your life? no, it's not. if you ever feel like you're going to kill yourself, go to the hospital immediately.

24 Replies (last)