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I just wanted some support and advice on how to deal with negative comments.
A few people I know like to make negative comments about my weight, including calling me 'chubby', 'fat' and also telling me I am lying when I say how much I weigh.
I need to lose about 14 pounds and tone up. I am 5'5 and I weigh 137 pounds!
I know I am not obese or anything, but I have a hard time letting these comments not affect me and I end up getting upset and dwelling on the comments.
Does anyone else experience this and if so, how do you deal with it?
Can you not be friends with them anymore?
They don't sound like people you should listen to/hang around. At 5'5" 137, you're in the "normal" weight range. Anything you want to do to tone up should be for yourself because you're fine as you are.
if only i could not be friends with them! they are in my boyfriends family so it's impossible for me not to be in contact with them! my boyfriend say's it's just their humour, but i don't find it funny and it hurts my feelings....my boyfriend say's i should just rise above it, but I cant seem to do it!
Thank you for your final comment about being fine the way i am...i have been starving myself for days after the last comment and it wasnt because i wanted to it was because of the comment...
Glad to help- you really are fine as you are.
If they make the comments again, gather up your strength and let them know comments about what you eat or how much you weigh are not okay with you. Set the boundary and don't let their insensitivity get to you. (easier said than done, i know!).
Why doesn't your boyfriend talk to his family about how their comments hurt? He should step in and step up to help his girlfriend! It's just plain wrong that they do this to you. I am so sorry you have to deal with such rotten comments. I know negative comments hurt, but you gotta try to rise above it and say F%$* them, they're just jealous.
Stay positive and do what's right for YOU!
I can understand. Many times I do get these comments, from friends, my husband's family and my own family too, and I had started getting them when I was just 8 pounds over the "ideal" weight. Even now, when I have lost 20 pounds almost, I don't see any encouragement.
I wish people would have some sensitivity and I wish it was easy to "unfriend" certain friends....but that's easier said than done. Just ignore these comments (hard, but not impossible) and do not give them any power to affect your self-esteem. Tell these people firmly that it is absolutely none of their business to comment on your body, whatsoever its shape, size and other aspects. Period.
You need to speak up to them. Ugh...what a bunch of jerks! But they don't know they're hurting you until you let them know.
My advice, talk to them all separately. If these people get a rise out of ridiculing others, chances are they are very defense as well and could feel attacked if you ask them to stop (one half of my family is like this).