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Beware the turnip-fries!!!

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My dear friends, let me steer you away from one regrettable experiment I undertook in an effort to find healthy substitutions for favorite indulgences. Trust me, itā??ll save you time and probably a few frown lines:

DO NOT attempt to make a side of fries out of fresh turnips.

I read a tip from a magazine that a turnip, cut into strips and baked, makes a terrific low-cal substitute for French fries. I donā??t know what hallucinogenic substance this writer was on when she penned that little gem, but Iā??m here to testify that turnips most definitely do not taste like fries. They taste like ASS, and no amount of catsup in the cupboard is going to make these nasty strips of vileness acceptable to the palate.

 Iā??m not a fan of cooked cabbage, and turnips, to me, smell and taste like cooked cabbage. Maybe the Nazi-inspired writer who came up with this idea is laughing her buns off right now. After all, she convinced thousands of trusting readers that this putrid vegetable with the flavor and texture of a glob of goo scraped from the bottom of a Taco Bell grease trap is a suitable stand-in for the beloved spud.  That spud-sub is a dreadful dud.

I'm sure there are a billion stories out there. Time for you all to chime in on your own disasters with substitute foods.
Edited Sep 02 2007 19:23 by united2gether
Reason: clarified topic in title
15 Replies (last)
I personally love turnip, and I think turnip fries would taste great.. but nothing like potatoe fries for sure.

Anyways, me and my bf went to a truck stop for supper a few weeks back and ordered an appetizer plate that bragged fried chicken, fries, o rings and fresh veggies. When the food arrived we found out that the "fried" was about all the food, not just the chicken. We ended up with battered deep fried turnip, cauliflower and green beans. Let me tell you, deep frying turnip is possibly the worst idea anyone has ever came out with!
And why all the hate for Taco Bell grease trap glob of goo? :P

I had an experience with eggplant.  One of my favorite meals is eggplant parmisign which is breaded fried eggplant with tomato sauce and mozerralla cheese baked.  Found a recipe which baked eggplant and I almost gagged.  Then I realized the eggplant parmisign uses the thinnest slices of eggplant so theyre mostly breading. 

Had a similar reaction when I went from fried okra to okra in soup.  It was slimey and bad tasting.  Still have a taste for it fried unfortunately.  When I later had fried catfish and even later baked catfish, realized it wasnt the okra or the catfish.  It was the fried cornbread outside.

Oh and when I was 7 my older brother explained chocolate extract was concentrated so I would taste it all day if I drank some.   Nope and you have to taste it to know the horror of it.
Butternut squash fries... They taste alright but the texture is slimey and gross.

Cabbage leaves dipped in salsa instead of crisps almost made me vomit too.
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primadonna, you must have not baked them long enough, because mine always turn out wonderfully! my first batch WAS slimey but then the second time I cooked them longer and they were WONDERFUL. I now like them better than regular fries!

Just preheat the oven to 425 degrees, lay the butternut squash fries on a baking sheet misted with nonstick cooking spray, shake some salt over them, and bake for 20 minutes. After 20 minutes, take them out, flip each fry over, and bake another 20 minutes or until they begin to brown a little bit. MMMMMMM!!!!
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I disagree, I think both turnip fries and butternut squash fries are awesome. I make them all the time.
Personally, I don't need to substitute turnips for potatoes.  I love potatoes!  It's all the crap we dump on them that makes them not diet friendly.  I buy cheap frozen french fries, the type that are made of only potatoes and salt, no added fats.  then I bake them in the oven with a little cooking spray, or just bake them plain.

I once heard that orange juice on cereal was good.  Yuck!  I'll stick to my skim milk, or low fat soy milk!
.. I like boiled okra, sun123 :P  Favourite part of Thanksgiving; when Daddie throws all the leftover turkey in a pot with some noodles, okra, and pepper, and boils ituntil it turns into jello.  Stick a hunk in your bowl, add some water, and enjoy.  It tastes like pure slime with the occassional okra seed surprise.

As for my food substitute?  I developed a severe allergy to milk a few years ago, temporary thankfully, and was told to eat my Rice Krispies with water.

For some reason, whatever it may be, cereal turns to mush in water within seconds. 
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Mooo87, I'm going to try the butternut squash your way and get back to you. It may also be that my turnip was underdone as well, but I think I'll just stick to my sweetpotato fries before I attempt turnips again! I get plenty of veggies, so I don't think I'll feel deprived without the 'nips.
lotus root chips are awesome!
lol, cellulitedelight, your okra turkey soup slime sounds absolutely gross. haha. I usually eat my cereal with water though, but just enough to get the cereal wet, not enough for it to "float". really good with kashi crunch cereal :)

I've been searching for good things to do with turnips (besides roasting, which may be the best ever) that are diet-friendy, and came across this recipe for caramelized turnips.

I'm not sure how they would taste, but I love caramelized onions and caramelized garlic.


2007 thread.

Yep. I turned up this old thread in search looking for turnip recipes. Is it verboten to comment on old threads?

when making a plate of raw vegies to dip (or not) I always do celery, carrot, radishes, peppers, scallions, and turnip! It is great raw...sweet and crunchy

I also make a cooked, mashed carrot and turnip casserole: Boil both together in any proportions you like-I do 50/50 and drain, mash with butter, place in a buttered casserole dish and top with a light mix of Italian bread crumbs and butter. Bake until hot. This is great to bake when you have a roast chicken or anything in the overn already-only takes the last 25 minutes or so to heat and brown.

I love turnips and carrots just mashed w/o anyhting added, too...for thosde who don't want the butter!

Original Post by geniuswaitress:

Yep. I turned up this old thread in search looking for turnip recipes. Is it verboten to comment on old threads?

Nope, but there are a bunch of zombie-phobes around here.  When they come for our brains, we keep track of who to blame.

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